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Half-Spartan#1: “Teleportation is not Good to Me”

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Master Chief, from Halo, is peeking around a corner. He tells himself he's in quite a pickle right now and that, if he moves too quickly, his mortal foe may spot him, forever writing it in stone that he defeated him. Master Chief is staring at another Spartan soldier identical to himself, jumping around and screaming die, die, newb, shut the fuck up in old Internet leet-speak. Master Chief points out his foe does not know about his teleporter. Master Chief looks up at an orange glowing circle in a wall above, then at another similar circle elsewhere, telling himself that the teleporter will teleport him to the other side of the warzone, giving him enough time to make the first move. Master Chief starts to move while, down below, his rival jumps around screaming lol and get the fuck out.

Master Chief reaches the portal and jumps in. The teleporter makes a strange buzzing sound and everything glows white around Master Chief. He then wakes up somewhere else on the ground, telling himself that this is different. He looks to the side.

Master Chief gets up with a groan. He is at a World War II warzone. He sees a Nazi peeking out from behind a window. Chief greets him, noting that's quite the frown he got there, then asks where he is. The Nazi immediately points his handgun at Master Chief and cocks the the hammer. Chief notes that teleportation is not good to him. The Nazi fires the gun, but immediately, another portal effect envelops Master Chief. Chief wakes up again on the ground and wonders what hell this is. He is lying next to a C4 bomb ticking down at a bombing spot from Counter-Strike.

The bomb explodes, but Master Chief is once again teleported elsewhere.

A train arrives at the City 17 train station from Half-Life 2. The doors open and Master Chief comments on the stunning graphics, a destroyed city and ambience that leaves little hope. He notes that this can only mean one thing. He exits the train, hearing Doctor Breen say welcome, welcome to City 17. Master Chief exclaims that it is Halo 3. The end.

Next comic:

#2: “My Legs don’t Bend That Way”

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