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Worse than LifeOffice life

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AJ Rimmer's narration explains that, having just started working in an office, he thought he would share some insights he has recently made on the subject. He declares that we meet our hero in full swing, as we see Rimmer in front of a computer doing tech support on the phone, saying that he is sure it must be horrible to have been without Internet access for a full day, then asking if he could please just try plugging in his modem. A moment passes, then Rimmer, looking exasperated, assures the customer that the modem cannot be rigged to explode upon conecction. The narration states Rimmer's log, day eight thousand, one hundred and ninety-three, still have not had sex, hope waning, work slowly destroying will to live. The narration further states that work comrades are all insane, lazy, mentally unstable and rude. We then see Linn, the office slut and gossip girl, whom Rimmer labels as possibly mentally retarded, telling Rimmer that the boss told her she couldn't get a day off even though she, like, totally wanted one, then wondering how he cannot know about her sister's in-grown toenail. Afterwards, we meet Mike, who was worked at that office for five years and is the most trained technician there, who behaves like a cocky ass because of it. Mike tells Rimmer he saw that log he wrote and that that is not how you spell phosphorus, then calls him an idiot. Rimmer's narration states that Rimmer wants to be Mike so much it hurts. The narration then introduces Rimmer's boss, monitoring unit 24-B, a robot who denies Rimmer's request to get time off to go to the dentist and adds that the meeting has taken twenty-eight point two seconds and will deduct zero point zero zero eighty-seven dollars from Rimmer's salary. Rimmer notes that it's not all bad though, sometimes there's a lull of several seconds between calls when you can lean back and listen to the dull hum of the air conditioning, and though Rimmer had originally been worried that a placement so close to the Xerox machine would cause unwanted traffic, he had failed to see the full potential, as we see Rimmer stare at the ass of a woman who is struggling with the machine telling it to just shut up and take it like a good girl, which Rimmer notes is an actual quote. Rimmer concludes his train of thought by saying it is always nice to expand one's experiences, as we see him waiting to use the bathroom, and we get a brief overview of the office, featuring a dead plant, his place near the Xerox machine, his co-workers Linn, Ellen, Mike, cute girl and what's-his-face, and the boss's door, always open as a trick. The end.

Next comic:

Valentine’s day Special
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+ Message from Rimmer

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