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Kenny the Copin “Transformation”

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At Nova Prospekt, Nattie, Danny and the Overwatch soldier from Combine Exchange Program are reading their scripts in front of their director, Mjolnir. Danny comments he likes the script, but he does have some questions, like, why wait until episode 10 to give their characters names. Mjolnir retorts he thought the whole characters-with-no-names thing was cool at first, okay. Nattie asks why they are a girl, noting they don't exactly have a girlish figure.

Mjolnir tells Nattie if the Combine can take their butthole, they can take other things, gesturing to his chest. The soldier asks what's with the heartfelt moments, noting it's not Mjolnir's usual style. Mjolnir replies he's building something new there and is leaving his old meta humor behind, then adds that breaking the fourth wall is for amateurs.

Mjolnir stares at the camera for a moment, then asks what. Nattie is staring at him. They reply nothing, then adds there's someone behind Mjolnir. Mjolnir asks huh, unaware that Dillon and Kenny the Cop are standing behind him. Mjolnir turns around and enthusiastically greets Kenny, telling him long time no see. Kenny says hi, Mr. Creator Man, it's my birthday, then asks if Mjolnir forgot his promise.

Mjolnir replies no, of course not. Kenny excitedly says yay, new episode. Mjolnir rubs his neck and says he's kinda busy and he's sort. He cuts off when he sees Dillan staring at him. Two narration boxes exclaim my God, it's the if you make Kenny sad I'll take your spleen look.

Mjolnir says actually, they can make a new episode right now. He puts his hand on Kenny's shoulders and tells him he has to do something for him first. Kenny asks what's that. Mjolnir tells him he has to wake up. At GM Construct, there's a big pile of trash on top of Kenny as he sleeps on the bench.

Kenny springs awake from the trash, tossing it away. He looks around and says whoa, how long has he been asleep.

Kenny wonders when they renovated that place. Dillan approaches him and says he found a weird contraption he thinks Kenny oughta take a look at. Kenny replies that that sounds like a perfectly serviceable story hook and exclaims let's go, then stares for a moment at Dillan, noticing he has a new Western hat instead of his old homburg hat. Kenny asks if he has a new hat and Dillan asks if he likes it.

Kenny and Dillan stare at a large teleporter-like contraption on the rooftop of one of the buildings. Kenny wonders where did it come from. Dillan says he figured he'd know, seeing as he's the one with an underground lair full of things like this.

Kenny asks if he is, adding that it's been so long he must have forgotten. Dillan retorts it was two episodes ago. Kenny says yeah, but that's like sixteen in dog years. Kenny then notes he's gonna shove Dillan in there and see what happens, to which Dillan exclaims what. Kenny pushes Dillan into the contraption and says good luck.

A zapping sound is heard as a green light blinds Kenny for a moment. He then stares down saying oh, my God. Where Dillan was standing are now his hat and a sandwich. Kenny exclaims in horror that he's turned Dillan into a sandwich. He picks it up and says don't worry, they'll overcome this disability together and he can still live a long, fulfilling life. Kenny says you'll see, you'll see.

Cut to Kenny, wearing Dillan's hat, watching TV alongside the sandwich as Couper stares, confused. Later, Wilbur pushes Kenny and the sandwich in a bathtub with wheels as Couper and Frederick stare.

Couper and Frederick stare at one another in confusion. At City 17's playground, Kenny pushes a swing with the sandwich. Two nearby metro cops stare at each other. Later, Kenny sits at a bench with a sandwich, saying what a day, huh. He notes it's a shame they wouldn't let the sandwich in the movie theater.

Someone then takes Kenny's cowboy hat. Kenny turns around to find Dillan standing there, smiling as he puts on his hat. Kenny gets up and exclaims he thought he turned him into a sandwich. Dillan asks what he's talking about, explaining it only teleported him. Kenny asks really, where. Dillan mumbles um awkwardly.

In a flashback, Dillan is sitting on Doctor Wallace Breen's lap at his office. Dillan asks Breen what he's doing with an annoyed expression. Breen says uh and stares to the side, where a Combine Elite soldier and Doctor Mossman are staring in shock. In the present, Dillan tells Kenny he might say it was a.

Pain the ass, says Dillan with a smile. Dillan and Kenny heartily laugh. A final panel says happy eighteenth anniversary, Kenny the Cop, as Dillan, Frederick, Kenny, Couper, the sandwich stealer and Wilbur stand around in GM Construct wearing party hats, with a cake in a small table nearby. The end.

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1 thought on “in “Transformation””

CJR

April 22, 2023

Holy crap, now there’s a shot of nostalgia!

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