JeffEpisode #122: “Level Revel”

Jeff and Jerry stand inside the chamber of the evil Vizier Wald. They stare down the vizier. As Jerry starts moving forward, Jeff tells him to hold up there for a second, then explains that stepping onto the main floor triggers the boss battle. He asks Jerry to cast every single buff spell Jerry has on him before they start the fight. Jerry proudly states alright, then notes he'll be glad to get rid of some of those scrolls, revealing he has been keeping all of them stuffed inside his armor.
Jeff asks why Jerry didn't put the scrolls into his inventory scrolls, showcasing his own inventory slots. Jerry stares forward for a moment, then asks his whats. Jeff tells him never mind and to just start casting. Jerry grabs a scroll and says let's start with some of the classics, then points his wand at Jeff and declares Haste, Bless as a glow comes out of the wand. He continues by declaring Stonerskin, to which Jeff says uh. Jerry then declares bestow curse. A light emanates from his wand and Jeff screams in pain, then asks what the hell. Jerry says oops, sorry, I didn't read the last half of that before I started speaking. Jerry then summons Catgirl's Grace to Jeff's confusion, then Resist Temptation to Jeff's even higher confusion. Jerry then casts Alleviate Allergy, to which Jeff thanks him, noting the ragweed around there is awful. Jerry then casts Blade Ward, Death Ward and Burt War. Jeff interrupts him to ask if Jerry can cast any of these spells without the particle effects, noting he can't see everything; Jeff is surrounded by a bright glow. Jerry says oh yeah, I guess I should dial that down a bit. Moments later, Jeff tells Jerry the plan: he will rush in, get a few good hits on Vizier Wald, then he'll roll left and Jerry hits him with his most powerful spell. Jerry replies he's got a ninth level Testicular Torsion spell prepared with Vizier Wald's name on it. Jeff says let's not keep him waiting then and steps forward.
A cutscene starts where Vizier Wald monologues, calling Jeff and Jerry foolish adventurers and saying they're too late, he already wields the staff and now, with the powers of Coubah-Deg, he will be unstoppable. Suddenly, Jeff cuts him off by calling out Wald's name and shouting skip cutscene, asshole. Jeff attacks Vizier Wald with a sword and suddenly Wald explodes in a shower of bones and blood.
Jeff says hot damn as Jerry approaches, Jerry exclaims hot damn and Jeff shouts hot damn. As they look over the remains of Vizier Wald, Jeff asks what spell did Jerry hit him with as that was brutal. Jerry replies he didn't cast anything, Jeff obliterated him with one hit. Jeff notes he guesses they didn't need to level up that much after all, then wonders how he didn't get any of that blood on himself. Jerry explains it's due to his Burt Ward spell from earlier, inspired by the fact that Mr. Ward never had any blood on him during his run as Robin in the 1966 Batman television series. Jeff exclaims what a convenient reason for not having low-quality blood decals on my armor. Jerry says yes, quite, then they both awkwardly look away repeating yeah, yep. A moment of silence passes, then Jeff shouts that was so unsatisfying and they wasted so much time. Jerry agrees, noting he didn't even get to hit Wald. Suddenly, they start becoming pixelated. Jeff asks what is this and Jerry wonders if it's a two-phase fight. Jeff says he's never tried it before, but that kind of feels like dying. Jerry says that's a terrible loot drop. They hug and Jeff says just in case they are actually dying, he had a pretty fun time doing this adventure with him and he's sorry that he's so mean to Jerry frequently, adding it's mostly just for comedic purposes but on some occasions he's genuinely dumb. Jerry says thanks and that he had a pretty fun time too. Everything fades to white.
Jeff and Jerry come to back in their regular clothes in a blank void. Jeff says oh, we're, then notes he doesn't know what they are and wonders if this is purgatory. Jerry disappointedly notes he's back to dystopian future rebel armor instead of badass medieval suit of armor. Suddenly, the wizard Sid Phernif pops up from nowhere in their middle, saying hello hads. Jeff screams aaaaallo there, Sid. Jerry asks him what's going on and Sid points to somewhere and says that's what's going on, they did it. A pixelated sign in the middle of the air declares quest completed. Sid Phernif tells them they've saved the realm from the mad Vizier Wald and peace has been restored. Sid then points them towards a portal that he says it's back to their world. Sid then puts his hands on their shoulders and tells them that's not all, as a personal reward, they both get one wish each.
Sid Phernif asks Jerry what he would like and Jerry declares he wishes that his McDonald's coupon wasn't expired. Sid tells him it shall be done. Jerry happily rushes towards the portal saying one free hashbrown with eligible purchase, here he comes, and tells Jeff he'll see him on the other side. Sid asks Jeff what he wants. Jeff crosses his arms and says he knows that Sid is just a hallucination from the bad drug trip that he's on, so he has no real power, but he really appreciates Sid being a nice hallucination and not something weird or scary. Jeff starts walking towards the portal saying see ya, then hesitates and turns around. Sid looks at him with an expectant smile. Jeff approaches Sid and mumbles something in his ear. Fade back to the City 17 train station, where three bodies are lying on the ground.
Jeff, with the newspaper over his face, Jerry and a third man in rebel gear are lying on the ground at the City 17 train station steps. Jeff comes to and wonders if they're back; a physically twisted Jerry mumbles ow. The third man raises his head, revealing himself to be John. John says that was something and asks what the guys experienced. Jerry tells him they were stuck in a medieval RPG video game world for like seven months. Jeff says they were somehow having a shared trip, then asks where John was. Cut to a flashback of John falling down in a weird digital world. In the present, John says he has no idea but he thinks his ego died or something. Jerry takes out the McDonald's coupons from his pocket and disappontedly notes he guesses it was all for nothing, his coupon is still expired. John asks if those are McDonald's coupons and shows Jerry he got new ones in the mail just yesterday. Jerry looks to the sky with hands raised and a big smile and says thank you, Sid. As Jerry and John walk away, John turns to tell Jeff he has a three can dine for eighty-six and ninety-nine dollars coupon and asks if Jeff's interested. Jeff replies nah, he'll just catch up with them later on. Alone, Jeff sighs and picks up his newspaper. As he reads it, he stares at his old, low-quality hand. Suddenly, his hand changes, with his fingers splitting from each other rather than being a mitten hand. Jeff smiles and says thanks, Sid, then keeps reading his newspaper. The end.
Blank space, then cut to a post-credits scene: someone stares at Jeff, who has a kill icon hovering over his head. It's Jerry, with a sinister look. A message appears on screen, objective: kill Jeff. A final narration box says oh, shit.

2 thoughts on “Episode #122: “Level Revel””

  1. Episode #122 fun facts!
    1) The Skyrim armors that Jeff and Jerry are wearing (Ebony armor and Glass armor respectively) were a pain in the ass to use. One touch of the torso or hips with the physgun would glitch up the entire ragdoll and ruin the posing.
    2) I’d been meaning to incorporate a Jeff model with fingers for a while, but it was a last minute decision to incorporate it into this plotline. Good reward, I think.
    3) The Placeable Particle Effects addon really pulled its weight for this comic (magic effects, blood splatter, portal). Check it out! Details in credits below.

    Maps (in order of appearance): Halloween Crypt by “Cathode Ray Kobold,” gm_construct by Garry’s Mod team, d1_trainstation_02 by Valve team, Manifold Garden by “TheOgre26”

    Models (in vague order of appearance): Rigged Skyrim Armors by “TheDizcordumSeventh” and “Viktoria,” Skyrim Weapon Pack by “DarkMario,” Medieval Fantasy Playermodels Megapack by “Marty” and “Eskil,” Medieval RP Content by “aE.KoZ,”

    Misc: Placeable Particle Effects by “madneo”

    Special thanks to George Stukas for hexing Jeff with fingers and Jerry’s head, and Mythos for hexing Jeff’s head.

    Reply

  2. *sniff*
    What a beautiful end to the arc.

    It was a wild ride from start to end and real delight to read!
    Can only say: fantastic work, Clover! (PS. Congratulations on getting rid of crab hands)

    Reply

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